Love and Heartbreak in Utah

2016-01-01

I fell head over heels, love at first sight, spent every minute thinking about Utah. With my heart on my sleeve and head in the clouds I intently followed its perfect paths as it lured me through its soft yet strong curves that hugged me till the days end and lifted me high above, floating in the sky and dangled me under perfect sunsets. It flaunted its depths in the safely of its canyons. It shared with me its true colors that span an entire palette. It showed its vulnerability with wide open salt lakes that reflected the true meaning of life. I experienced it’s wild side with wide-roaming buffalo and the call of distant coyote in the days end. It made me feel loved, important, and elated. Immediate obsession. We were meant to be together.

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Salt Lake City itself is small and quiet. The capital building takes second place off in the distance as Utah makes clear its priority to its religious roots. All roads literally lead to its most influential structure, the Salt Lake Temple of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. It’s a pretty, gothic style, castle-like building that dominates over the many plain, mid-rise buildings and shopping malls of downtown Salt Lake.

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Utah’s quirkier side is highlighted by silly liquor and food laws. Beer on tap is always 3.2% by weight, so basically water. Fine. I can settle for a real beer in a bottle or a can and many places offer a great selection. If you want a cocktail it will have no more than exactly 1.5 ounces of alcohol in it and will be made for you behind a secret partition. But how’s a girl suppose to get a proper gin martini then? Oh, you can’t. If you’re in a restaurant you must have food in front of you in order to be allowed to drink. Seriously? Ok, fine. All the absurdity that comes with getting a drink in Utah makes one need a drink! It’s cool though cause Utah is doing it’s own thing and brewing its own hop heavy beer, and it’s pretty tasty even if you can’t get it on tap.

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But alas, we could never truly be. Utah may be one of the most beautiful creations on the planet but we just couldn’t see eye to eye when it came down to the things that matter. I tried to laugh off the silly laws. I was willing to compromise on when and how to eat and drink, only to be told my burger will always come cooked well done and Utah won’t budge on that. That’s where I draw the line. Thanks for everything, lover. I’ll never forget you. You’ll always be one of my favorite but I just need more red red meat. Maybe we can hang out again one day. I’d really like that but for now, I have to move on. Looks aren’t everything but promise you’ll stay beautiful, ok?!

Next up, Colorado.

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